Phone Sex Show #072: Praise Kink

Welcome in, gentlemen. You’re listening to the Phone Sex Show. I’m Mari, a sensual domme who takes clients exclusively by phone. You’ll be hearing from me and my fellow femdom sisters as we talk about experiences with submissive And some not-so-submissive men just like you. If you’ve ever wanted to lean into submissive kinks or you’re erotically curious, you’re gonna love spending time with us. And who knows, maybe you’ll decide to give one of us a call. Find us on the web Hey guys, welcome back. You’re listening to The Phone Sex Show.

This is episode number 72. I’m Mari. I’m here with Mia. Hi, Mia.

Hello, Mari. Hello, gentlemen.

I want to talk about praise. How does it feel to receive praise, Mia?

Well, considering that, like, words of affirmation is one of my love languages, I fucking love praise.

Yeah?

Yeah.

I found out That I am really good at giving praise.

Mm-hmm.

Words are my gift. And now, I wouldn’t say that this part comes naturally to me, but as I have cultivated self-compassion, as I have cultivated self-love, intentionally finding things about myself that I like, as I have practiced that in my own life, it has been easier to do the same thing with other people. Mhm.

And I remember there’s a man that came into my spicy world pretty early, one of the callers, and we were talking about how he would love to be of service to me, and he was describing like his perspective of the perfect day. All the ways that he would serve me, pleasure me, lift me up, take care of my environment, make every part of my life smoother, more abundant, and, and deeply pleasurable. And as I was touching myself And thinking, closing my eyes and just thinking about this picture that he was painting, it just bubbled up out of nowhere. I’m like, oh my goodness, you are an amazing sub. You are a perfect pet.

You are a beautiful giver. You are an intuitive, warm, creative giver of pleasure. And He exploded with a massive orgasm.

Mm-hmm.

In the midst of all of that. And hearing him come— I love to hear a man come. Hearing him come was just such a thrill to me. And he said, I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry, Mari, I’m so sorry. I’m like, what are you apologizing for? That was hot. He said, I, I didn’t get permission. He said, I felt like, like— and I’m not making this weird— he’s like, I felt like a little kid, you know, getting a pat on the cheek. Like, I just felt like I’d just been complimented by my by my teacher or something.

Like, I just felt so proud. Like, this, this puffing up of, oh my God, she sees me. She likes me. I’m pleasing her. And like, like you said, I just blew. And I said, well, next time you’ll slow down and ask permission. Yes, Mari. Absolutely.

Absolutely. But I had other experiences. I’ve had other experiences like that since then, and I realize it’s a praise kink, and it’s a, it’s a polar opposite to the humiliation kink.

Hmm.

Where somebody craves to be verbally torn down. You’re pathetic. You’re weak. You’re not enough. You didn’t do it right. Listen to me next time. What’s wrong with you? Like, there are men for whom that harsh language is what gets them to orgasm. I, I would say I far prefer praise kink to humiliation kink.

It flows more naturally. However, humiliation can be really fucking hot when you’re telling the truth. You know, I don’t want anyone to think that I don’t enjoy humiliation. Yeah, I do.

I don’t have any experience with like the praise kink. I don’t even like— I mean, I get, I get what it is, but yet I don’t understand it. Kind of like I get the humiliation thing, but I don’t understand that either. Mm-hmm.

It’s, it, it’s something we practice. And at first, when you’re practicing something that you’re not very good at, it feels awkward. Yeah. And this is where I want to shout out the men who call new flirts On the platform, knowing full well they might be getting someone with real-world experience, but they might be getting someone who’s playing with the kink for the first time. I am so blessed to have run into so many patient men in that first 6 months or a year. Even to this day, sometimes men will call with an unusual kink.

Mhm.

And I will have to say, I don’t know what you’re talking about. Can you explain it to me? Some men, truly submissive men, will grasp that as an opportunity to serve me. To say, yes, goddess, ask me anything, or yes, goddess, let me tell you what I mean. That’s— Considering that you’re paying for every minute of our time, if you’re using that time to educate me on your kink and fetish, that is service. And if that turns you on, it’s a win-win. Now, some men are messy bottoms. And just so we know, messy bottom is not my erotic humiliation. That’s my disrespect.

Mm-hmm.

I want to be crystal fucking clear. If I call you a messy bottom, if I tell you that’s messy bottom behavior, I am hiding you because they don’t fucking like it. Okay, if you’re a messy bottom, you’re not thrilled to educate me. You’re impatient. You’re like, ugh, I didn’t get the dial-a-dom I was looking for. Fuck off with that shit.

Dial-a-dom.

Seriously, I am so over messy bottoms and their dial-a-dom fucking bullshit. Dominate me. No, not like you want to dominate me. Dominate me like I want you to dominate me, you pathetic little messy bottom. I’ll hang the fuck up on you, and I don’t give a shit. There are plenty of other flirts out there who are more— they don’t say it, and I’m not criticizing them. Fellow flirts, I’m not fucking criticizing you. Some of you are literally answering the phone with a You’ve reached Dial-A-Dom.

What’s your bottom fantasy today? And it works for you. You, you, you’re a phone actress. You fucking love it. It’s— I’m not criticizing it. I respect it. I admire it. I can’t fucking do it. I just, I just can’t.

I’m not enough of a professional. There’s some bullshit in that sentence.

Yeah.

But I would rather, I would rather practice praise kink than humiliation kink. Especially if I’m— especially if I’m a little low energy because it just flows out of me easier.

Mm-hmm. I mean, I feel like I do it a little bit because I like to be like, oh, you’re such a good boy. You like to, you know, do what I tell you to do. Oh, you said yes, goddess. You know what your goddess likes to hear. Like, good job. So I feel like I do it a little bit because that’s just natural for me too.

You do. You do. I’ve heard you. Good boy. That feels nice. Yes. Um, it’s interesting because the phrase good boy or good girl It’s praise and it’s a little humiliating,

right?

For a grown man to be called boy or girl, for the sissies in the room. I asked my— I asked our spicy AI to give me a description of praise kinks.

Ooh.

And it— this is the— this is what it’s given me. A praise kink is sexual or emotional arousal from receiving Or giving verbal affirmation during intimate moments. Someone with a praise kink gets turned on by being told they’re doing well, that they’re good, that their partner is pleased with them. Being a words of affirmation pillow princess. Think about, think about some of the men that you’ve been on the phone with and how they’ve described loving your big, beautiful, soft breasts and your luscious thighs and your round ass and, and how delicious you are, how sweet your toes taste? Like, do you find yourself like literally like puffing up a little? Like, oh yes, good boy. Well, that feels nice. Just the words.

Yeah, yeah. Because I’m a— like, the more you describe something, like, that turns me on more. But I was actually— I was thinking about something in my personal life because Like, if I’m giving my man a blowjob and he is like, God, I love the way you suck my cock. God, you’re, you know, doing so great, or whatever. That, like, I’ve never thought about it until we just talked about this, you know, now. And I’m like, that does make me like, that turns me on. Yeah. It makes me want to be even better.

We, we don’t talk a lot about our real life partners, kind of intentionally.

Yeah.

However, um, I don’t keep it an incredibly tight secret that I have a partner, that he is Ah, I’m gonna stop myself. I, I ethically, I wanna, I always wanna honor his privacy.

Yeah.

But same for me. It’s the, it’s so he does not speak words of affirmation, this to the degree that it sounds like your partner does. But it’s the moans. It’s the way the body is reacting. It’s the body feedback that’s telling me, oh, I’m doing— I am— he’s feeling all kinds of wonderful right now.

Yeah.

Um, I think if he did speak praise words more often, it would be really fucking hot. I think I would really enjoy it. Yeah. But yeah, words of affirmation are not a big thing for him. Um, his acts of service, let’s just say he’s got that nailed right the fuck down. Um, so a praise kink is when someone gets turned on by being told they’re good, sexy, wanted, doing a great job, being such a good boy. And they agree with me, it’s the flip side of a humiliation kink. Instead of being broken down, they are built up.

Now, Mia, I will say, um, I have gooners. I had a 2-hour gooner call yesterday, and the same gooner was with me for 3 hours like 3 days before, so I was shocked to hear from him.

Damn,

gooners can get into a spiral, you know. It’s a long call.

Mhm.

And I am doing most of the talking, and I know him well. Um, he likes, he likes humiliation, and he’s fascinated with my dynamic as a, as an alpha, as a cuckoldress. Um, and one of the things I’ve learned about really long calls is that I, I do not like straight humiliation hours on end.

Mm-hmm.

So I’m playing a game of up and down, like Have you— are you leaking? Yes. Taste it. Yes, Goddess. Good boy. And I’ll spiral up into like 15 minutes of praise and connection and, and, you know, demanding he take a break, setting a little timer. You can’t touch until you hear the bell. Um, And then when he— when he— then there’s just— it’s, it’s about feeling energy.

Yeah.

More where he needs it to get a little more intense again, and then I’ll, then I’ll, you know, start sliding down into the, into the humiliation again. And it’s, it’s edging. It’s, it’s emotional edging. Emotional, erotic, physical edging. Okay. The sub with a praise kink seeks approval, seeks acceptance for their kinks and fetish, and that’s something that’s harder to find When your kinks are unusual.

Mm-hmm.

Like the, like the sweet man who has a blueberry obsession who calls me. Speaking of, speaking of him, he definitely has praise kink. He never ever fails to praise me.

Hmm.

For how I play with him, how I understand him. He gives me lots of praise for devoting myself to understanding his kink. I, I, I told a, a sub the other day, we were just chatting. We, we’ve never actually been on a call. He’s just chatted and he’s bought goodies. Um, he said, do you have an assignment for me, Goddess? I said, I do. I said, I want you to do this thing. Um, but if you’d like to earn a couple gold stars, you’ll do this too.

And he tributed immediately.

Nice.

He said, um, he said, thank you for the assignment, Goddess. I will earn those gold stars, I promise you.

Aww.

And, and, you know, praise, gold stars. It’s hitting something. It’s, it’s, there’s a reward center in our brain. It’s dopamine. It’s, it’s adrenaline. It’s, it’s so pleasurable to check the box, to finish the thing, to do it right, to get the nod, to get the praise. Not everyone wants praise. Some people are deeply uncomfortable with praise.

Oh yeah,

I have a— I don’t like to be schmoozed. It’s only meaningful praise if it’s honest.

Yeah, 100%.

Same, same flip for the humiliation. Humiliation is only arousing if it’s true.

Mhm.

I could say I, I could, I could say, um, look at how your eyes light up at the sight of that banana, you little slut. You would look at me like, huh? What? Like, it’s not bananas. Sure, yummy snack, but like, they’re not turning me on. What the fuck are you talking about?

Yeah.

But, you know, but I can tease you about how hard you came when Michael was worshiping you verbally.

Well, yeah.

What a sweet little slutty pillow princess you are when you see him pop up in chat. Like, that’s the truth, and it gives you a tickle, doesn’t it?

Oh yeah.

Doesn’t it, Mia? We both love Michael so fucking much. There’s a, there’s a caller who gives just wave after wave after wave of, of, of praise, not even on sexual matters, just praising my intelligence, my creativity, My reliability. But like, I’m like, I’m like, oh my God, if you had been an English teacher, I probably would have done better in school. Um, like, it is really hot to be seen and acknowledged for what you bring to the table. Mhm. Praise kinks. They’re, they’re a lot of fun to play with. We would, we would both— I think we would both like to experience more men with praise kinks.

Yes, but the humiliation boys are still always welcome too. Well, thank you for spending some time with me, Mia. Guys, thank you for spending time with us.

Yes, thank you guys.

This has been episode number 72 of Phone Sex Show. You can find us on the web at phonensexshow.com. You can leave stars and reviews for this podcast wherever you’re listening. You can share it with somebody on social media if you wanted to. He wanted to praise us a little bit. All right, we’ll see you next time. Bye, boys. You’ve been listening to the Phone Sex Show.

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